‘I’d rather not have a baby shower, but don’t dare to say it’

Raising children is sometimes accompanied by difficult situations and parental concerns. That is why Lisa van den Akker, editor-in-chief of family and J/M Parents and mother of four children, weekly especially for Subway a parenting (related) question from parents. This week a question from Sanne: “I would rather not have a baby shower, but dare not say it.”

How do you solve that? Lisa comes to the rescue.

‘I’d rather not have a baby shower, but don’t dare to say it’

“Hi Lisa, I don’t have a parenting question, but I hope you can help me anyway. I’d rather not have a baby shower, but I don’t dare to announce it to friends either. Did it carefully, but they said: ‘That’s not your concern!’. Should I be clearer? Or is this just part of it? Thanks in advance!

– Sanne “

The answer

“Hi Sanne,

I think a very recognizable ‘problem’ for many pregnant women. Although it is of course meant to be very sweet from your friends, it is also understandable if you are not waiting for a party, or for all this attention in the last weeks of your pregnancy. As difficult as it may be, I think it’s best to clearly state this to your friends.

Also explain why you don’t want it. For example, don’t you want to get so many presents before the baby is born? Don’t like all the attention? Or maybe you don’t have the energy for a party at all? I think your girlfriends will definitely understand if you explain this to them. In addition, it is your pregnancy, so you decide how and what happens.

Do you find it difficult to disappoint your friends? Then you may want to think about an alternative. For example, during my last two pregnancies I had a small ‘baby shower’ with only the grandmothers and sisters-in-law, we went to a nice high tea somewhere and I found that very pleasant. Maybe you can also do something fun with only your best friends?

A day at a wellness or spa together might be something that makes you happy. In this article on family read more alternatives for a baby shower. And remember: your friends want to make you happy, so let us know what makes you happy. Good luck!”

Do you want to read all parenting (related) questions and answers? You will find them here.

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‘I’d rather not have a baby shower, but don’t dare to say it’